Americans: Fat, Dumb and (un)Happy

by John Young

The Federal Transportation Administration, in response to the reality of the expanding girth of Americans, has proposed raising the average passenger weight for calculating the safe loads of buses from 150 lbs per person to 175 lbs per person. This reflects CDC statistics of average weights of 165 lbs for women and 195 lbs for men.

Likewise, the Coast Guard has raised the estimated per-passenger weight for calculating the seaworthiness of vessels to 185 lbs per person; and the Federal Aviation Administration has raised the estimated weight of airline passengers to 195 lbs in winter and 190 lbs in summer.

Now, buses, boats and planes will be rated to carry fewer total passengers; meaning that delays will ensue, costs will climb, and in order to combat the delays, more buses, planes and boats will have to be purchased. More fossil fuels will be required. The individual cost may be low, but the aggregate cost is staggering.

We can look in a mirror and lie to ourselves; but the cold hard reality is that by these sorts of objective measures, Americans on average are likely the most overweight people ever to have existed on the planet in any substantial number. You don’t have to be a nutritional scientist to ascertain that something is terribly, terribly wrong.

Meanwhile, Newsweek gave 1,000 American citizens the standard citizenship we require of immigrants intending to become citizens. 38% flunked. These are not complicated questions, and they are written at a 6th grade level. A passing score is not very high either. Yet, amazingly enough, people who can’t even tell you how long the term is for a Senator get to vote for Senators. The teacher’s unions should be proud!

As if being fat and dumb were not enough; Americans seem to have hit a perfect 1,000 batting average, because according to WebMD the rate of anti-depression prescriptions doubled in nine years between 1996 and 2005. So we’re happy too.

Yet, people go on thinking that we should keep doing things the way we have been; even though objective measures in all realms indicate our society is in serious, serious trouble. Fat, dumb and happy is how you want your sheep that are prepared for slaughter, and most assuredly NOT how you want a supposedly self-governing citizenry.

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